Friday, April 22, 2016

Adrenalin: Fear the Rush

0.5/4

Starring: Natasha Henstridge, Christopher Lambert, Andrew Divoff

Rated R for Gruesome Violence and Gore, and for Strong Language

Watching "Adrenalin: Fear the Rush," I wondered what writer/director Albert Pyun was trying to do with this film.  Was he trying to create a surrealistic nightmare?  Or was he trying to make Ed Wood look like Steven Spielberg?  Either way, I felt my IQ drop with every passing minute.  Fortunately the movie is 77 minutes long, so I can still eviscerate it in a review.

This movie is bad in a way that few movies are.  It's so bad that you watch it with some kind of mental distance.  I guess it's the brain's way of protecting itself from spontaneous combustion.  Dario Argento's "Opera" looks better with each passing minute.  At least that movie didn't repeat itself incessantly.

There's not much of a plot.  It's a post-apocalyptic chase movie, although based on the evidence, I'm guessing that is so Pyun didn't have to bother changing anything when he got on location (the film was shot in the former Soviet Union).  The cars say "Policia" and everyone drives a Yugo, despite the fact that it takes place in 2007.  And in the United States.

As the two cops who are hunting down a cannibalistic serial killer/monster/something, Natasha Henstridge and Christopher Lambert do what they can: try not to choke on their dialogue and pick up a paycheck.  And if the most interesting character in the film is played by Andrew Divoff (the guy who played the Djinn in the "Wishmaster" movies), one thing should be completely obvious: your movie is screwed!

Not that any of them are helped by the director.  Shot selection is static and unsophisticated.  The choreography of the numerous action scenes is incoherent.  The gore is fake and the violence is laughable.  For instance, in one scene, the killer shoots two people repeatedly.  Apparently in the same place and causing them to wretch in the exact same way.  In a nutshell, Albert Pyun is the poster child of ineptitude.

Apparently, Miramax saw something in this that I didn't.  Using their Dimension Films label (which releases genre films), they actually picked this up for distribution on video.  What were they thinking?  The moron who made that blunder must have been on some heavy drugs.  That's the only answer I can come up with.  Fortunately, Bob Weinstein heavily re-edited and re-shot the film.  It's just a pity he didn't cut out the final 77 minutes and spare humanity from the sad fate of watching this piece of crap.

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